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Tuesday, April 21, 2020

Stop saying "It's Okay", it's not.

The Art and Responsibility of the Apology | Unpublished Ottawa

   This past semester, I had the biggest privilege to student teach in a 2nd-grade classroom. Throughout this journey, I learned so much about teaching, but I also learned extremely valuable life lessons. I remember one day the kids came inside from recess and there was an altercation between the two students. At this time, I was still in the observation stage so I was able to witness how my cooperating teacher handled this confrontation between two students. She made each student state both of their sides to the story and it turned out, as usual in 2nd grade, that is was just a miscommunication. My co-op then asked the students to both apologize to each other. After one of the students apologized the other student replied with "it's okay". Me, thinking this was normal, looked at the other student waiting for their apology, but my cooperating teacher said "don't say that, try saying "thank you for the apology", we don't want anyone thinking behavior that hurt you is okay". I was shocked by this. This was honestly never something I had thought about being so important, even into adult life. After my co-op handled the situation, I said to her that she just turned on so many light bulbs in my head. I could think of countless times I told someone it was okay even when they hurt me. I could easily say this was one of the most valuable things I had ever learned. We as people need to stop allowing behavior that hurts us. There are so many ways to reply to an apology without making it seem like the behavior was okay. You could say things such as, "I accept your apology", "I hear you", or "I appreciate your apology". When you tell someone something was okay it's giving them the right of passage to do it again. We need to learn to stop saying "it's okay" when it isn't. 



  1. THIS! Wow I just had a light bulb moment myself. Thank you for sharing such a valuable lesson :)

  2. You’re amazing buddy! You are going to be an outstanding teacher!

  3. Thank you for sharing this amazing lesson! :)

  4. Very interesting story! As a classroom teacher for 20 years and now a school librarian, I’m always on the lookout for behavior and classroom management tips. Thanks for sharing!

  5. I really like considering apologies in this way. I think it’s important to stick up for yourself and not let people walk all over you. :)


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